


Curry of Life

by slash4femme



Category: Naruto
Genre: Falling In Love, Fluff, Kissing, M/M, Post-Canon, Romantic Comedy, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-30
Updated: 2018-01-30
Packaged: 2019-03-11 08:37:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13520577
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slash4femme/pseuds/slash4femme
Summary: Lee has a special friend. Gaara is not pleased about this.Or of curry and letters and falling in love.





	Curry of Life

**Author's Note:**

> I started writing this in 2017. It was supposed to be short and funny and ended up being neither of these things. ::shrugs::

It starts with a letter.

_I thought you might be interested to hear that I have made my sixtieth attempt to create the perfect curry. Lee writes him. He's written Gaara a detailed account of the other fifty-nine attempts already. I am willing to admit that it was not my best batch although there were no casualties or even severe injuries this time. I do not understand it. I can make a grilled fish with mushrooms that even Tenten says is very good and have successfully prepared noodles that Naruto liked after only thirty-five attempts. But still, the secret to the perfect curry eludes me. I am beginning to think practice and hard work are not enough. I must have a sensei to guide me in learning the art of curry making. Luckily I have a special friend who possesses a true gift when it comes to cooking curry. I will visit him as soon as I am able and beg him to teach me at least a few of his secrets. I will write to you at once with the outcome of my next attempt._

_Your friend,_

_Rock Lee._

Gaara stares down the letter in his hands. It's early, the first pale dawn light just creeping through the windows. He has a full day ahead, committee meetings and several teams that have recently returned from missions and need to report to him. He's also promised to observe a practice session of the genin who are hoping to be promoted to chunin this year and report his thoughts on their readiness to their jounin team leaders. He also wants to go to the hospital today and visit with all of the shinobi currently recovering or being treated there.

He doesn't have time to reply to Lee's letter the way it deserves.

Gaara is always busy, he is Kazekage and his duties are many. Lee would never so much as think of complaining that Gaara does not write to him as often as Lee writes to Gaara. Still, Gaara feels guilty, like he should be giving more to their friendship.

So he does what he's been doing for about a year every time he can't properly reply to one of Lee's letters. He picks up his camera and carries into his planting room.

He picks out a potted cactus Lee has never seen before, a soft, little moon glow succulent almost looking like a flower in its pot. He held it between his hands and used the sand to manipulate the camera.

Kankuro had told him he needed to smile more in pictures, he'd look less frightening that way.

Gaara, who's spent quite a bit of time and energy over the years not being frightening, always tries although he's not sure he has the hang of it yet.

In this particular picture, he looks a little confused, like he's not quite sure what's happening or why he's having his picture taken holding a cactus. Which is ridiculous since he took the picture himself.

He debates doing it over again but then decided to just send the picture off as it was.

He puts the plant back on its shelf by the window and goes back to his bedroom to change into his Kazekage robes.

Lee's words from the letter drift into his mind as he pulls the robes over his shoulders choosing to leave them informally open in the front.

Luckily I have a special friend who is a true master when it comes to cooking curry.

Gaara frowns and shakes his head to dispel the thought.

Lee is sweet, kind and loyal. He loves caring for the people around him any way he can and makes friends almost as easily as Naruto.

The fact that Lee has many friends has never bothered Gaara before if anything he admires that about Lee.

Some people might look at Lee and think him silly or strange, especially when they first meet him. But Gaara has seen Lee change people's lives by giving them second chances, or by believing in them when no one else would, or just making them laugh.

Gaara has learned over the years that having friends could be a great gift and sources of strength but there's something in the way Lee had written about this particular friend that puts Gaara on edge, makes him feel unsettled.

He pushes that to the back of his mind. There is work to do today, each of the duties on his schedule deserves his full attention.

Still, he's mind wanders back to the letter as he lists to a committee member present on a plan to improve Suna's waste disposal.

_A special friend._

Gaara hadn't thought Lee had special friends. Unless of course, they were teammates. Gaara understands that the bond that formed between ninja who served on the same team for years is indeed special. He can even, theoretically, understand how the bond between master and student could be deeper than most.

Lee isn't talking about Tenten or Gai though, he's talking about some curry cook.

Who he has a special bond with evidently.

Gaara finds himself frowning so fiercely at one of the young genin he's trying to observe that she fumbles her ninjutsu right as her partner plummets off the side of the sandstone plateau they're all standing on.

Gaara tenses ready to intervene with the sand but she pulls the ninjutsu together at last minute summoning a huge hawk to snatch her teammate up mid-air and carry him to safety.

It was quite impressive actually.

Who is this curry making man and what is his relationship with Lee?

Back in his office Gaara glares at his lunch.

Like Lee, Kankuro has been working on his cooking skills recently. Today he's cut small radishes into the shape of cactuses.

They're adorable and Gaara is touched his brother has gone through such trouble to make him lunch. He also wonders if he should maybe send Kankuro on a mission sometime soon.

Kankuro had also told him yesterday that he'd developed a new technique for oiling puppet joints.

Gaara thinks he should probably make it a long and complicated mission.

He eats his lunch and thinks maybe he should have tried harder to smile in that photograph, or taken more until he had a better one to send.

It's too late though, the photograph went out in the morning's mail to Konoha. Besides, it shouldn't matter, Gaara had never worried about how he looked in the photographs he sent to Lee before.

Gaara is the Kazekage, he must always put his duties to Suna first and that means he cannot go to Konoha just to see Lee even though he very much wants to right now.

Lee has many friends, Gaara tells himself again. He's proud to include himself in that group.

Lee is his friend, a good friend.

Lee was the first person to make Gaara experience physical pain. The first to very nearly beat Gaara in a fight. The first to survive the Sand Coffin. Later he'd been the first person Gaara had used the sand to protect instead of hurt. He'd come to Gaara's aid and in doing so risked failing the chunin exams for the second time. He'd rescued Gaara when he'd been taken by the Akatsuki and he'd fought beside Gaara during the war.

They wrote to each other almost every week now, or Gaara would send pictures when he couldn't write.

Lee is Gaara's very dear friend.

A special friend.

Gaara finds himself glaring at the stack of mission reports he has to go through.

Really, he tells himself, it's nothing, a simple case of wording, he needs to stop this foolishness and get back to work.

~*~

Gaara gazes at the Konoha gates as they came into view.

This meeting with the Sixth Hokage could not have come at a better time. It had been a few weeks since Gaara had received that letter from Lee and his feeling of unease over it had only persisted.

Lee had written him since then of course although there had been no new cooking updates, only quick notes Lee had jotted down hastily on his way out to and then back from a mission.

Which had left Gaara thinking about that particular letter Lee had written him far more than he should. It was starting to feel like it could become a problem, this obsession of his over it. Gaara can't afford to let it go that far, he has to speak with Lee and figure out his feelings before it started actually affecting his work.

As it stood he would have arranged a trip of Konoha soon anyway but this invitation to come and speak with Kakashi about a new joint village genin training program they were devising had come at just the right moment.

Temari drops behind him as they come up to the gates. She'd been slightly ahead the entire trip both as a front guard while Kankuro had protected their rear but also because she is even more impatient to get to Konoha than he is.

Gaara thinks he can understand that. It has been over a month since she's seen her fiance after all. He is looking forward to seeing Shikamaru himself although not in the same way Temari is.

Both him and Kankuro have spent a good deal of time with Shikamaru since Temari announced their engagement and Gaara now counts him as a friend.

Perhaps he will have the opportunity to visit with Naruto as well, provide his isn't away on a mission.

There are many things to look forward to on this trip but Gaara reminds himself his top priority is meeting with the Hokage then he'll tracking down Lee.

There turns out to be no tracking involved though since Lee all but leaps out of the bushes as soon as Gaara, Temari and Kankuro cross into Konoha.

"Welcome Lord Kazekage, Temari-san, Kankuro-san!" Lee skitters to a halt and gives them his widest smile. "Lord Sixth has given me the honor of being our official escort during your visit here."

He has some leaves in his hair. Gaara wants to reach up and brush them away.

"I don't know if we actually need an escort," Kankuro says voice dubious. "We have been here before after all. Unless they're putting us in a new guest house or something."

Lee's smile falters ever so slightly.

Gaara tilts his head just enough to glare at Kankuro out of the corner of his eye. Kankuro gives him a very small 'all right, whatever you want' hand gestures in return.

"You are probably right Kankuro-san," Lee says and Gaara steps forward.

"Actually I would enjoy your company as our escort and please, just Gaara when we are among friends."

"But you are here on official village business so it is only proper I call you Lord Kazekage," Lee tells him very earnestly.

"Still." Gaara reaches out and puts his hand lightly on Lee's forearm. "Please call me Gaara."

Lee's gaze goes from Gaara's hand to Gaara's face in an instant and he blinks. "Of course, if that's what you want Gaara."

Gaara gives him a small smile. "Thank you."

"If we're done here." Temari cuts in. "I'm going to take off."

Gaara finds he's a little bit loathed to take his hand off Lee's arm but he does so, turning to his sister. "All right, either Kankuro or I will contact the Nara residence if we need you."

Temari nods and heads off to find Shikamaru.

"Are we staying in the same guest house?" Kankuro asks Lee.

"Yes, so I suppose you do not need me to show guide you there." Lee falls into step beside them anyway. "When is your first meeting with the Hokage?"

"This evening," Gaara says. "His letter said he wanted to give us enough time to settle in and eat dinner before getting down to business."

"Oh." Lee's face lit and he came to a stop in the middle of the street."I would be an honor if you would let me cook dinner for you Gaara."

Gaara can't help but smile at him. "I would like that."

"And of course Kankuro is also invited," Lee says quickly even though Kankuro is already shaking his head.

"No, that's okay. Thanks for the invite Lee but I promised I'd go out and get barbecue with Kiba and Shino. You two have fun though."

"I am very excited for you to try my cooking," Lee says as they start to walk again. "I will make grilled fish with mushrooms, it is my most successful dish. If I remember correctly last time you were in Konoha I could not cook at all so this will be a new experience for you, a culinary adventure." Lee clenches his fist to emphasize his words. The movement makes the muscles in his arm flex and bulge. He's put on more muscle mass in his arms and chest, Gaara notices and he appears to be taller too. It seems like every time Gaara sees him Lee has grown, taller, bigger, more muscular. It suits him.

They arrive at the guesthouse where Gaara normally stays. Kankuro helps him unpack their travel bags, which doesn't take long since they only include the bare necessities. Gaara takes off his Kazekage robes and folds them neatly setting the hat on top.

Lee's been hoving by the door. "Gaara if you'll excuse me I just realized I will need to run to the store in order to pick up the things for dinner."

Gaara turns back towards him. "I'll come with you."

"Oh no." Lee looks scandalize. "You're the Kazekage and my guest. I cannot take you shopping with me."

"I want to come," Gaara says. "Besides I do the shopping all the time back in Suna."

"But surely you have aides to do that sort of thing?" Lee's expression is more curious than scandalized now.

"Yes, but I prefer to do it myself. It gives me a chance to be amongst ordinary Suna citizens. I have found they more likely to speak with me about problems or concerns they have such an informal setting. It's also good for them to know that I am human and do such mundane things as the grocery shopping."

Lee's expression softens. "I cannot imagine there is anyone who truly still thinks you are not as human as the rest of us." He reaches out and brushes his hand across Gaara's, a feather-light touch that's gone in a moment but still sends a wave of heat through Gaara's entire body.

"Lee, may I come shopping with you?"

"Of course, I would love to have your company to the grocery store and also the fish market."

"And with that, I'm out." Kankuro gets up from the couch and heads for the door. "See you this evening Gaara."

"Bye Kankuro say hello to Kiba and Shino for us," Lee says and Gaara nods at his brother on the way out.

"So the grocers I usually go to is the one closest to my apartment," Lee tells him as they leave Gaara's guesthouse and head down the street walking side by side. "It is owned by Grandmother Hamasaki. She is very kind, I think you will like her a lot."

The shop in question is small, tucked out of the way on the same street as Lee's apartment building like he'd said.

"Hello, Grandmother Hamasaki," Lee calls as he pushes open the door and steps in.

"Hello, Lee dear." She comes around the counter to greet them, a tiny white-haired woman in dressed all in black.

"I have a friend with me today," Lee says. "This is Gaara. A shinobi of the Sand." He throws Gaara a quick glance as if asking if that introduction was alright and Gaara gives him a small nod.

"Hello, Grandmother Hamasaki," Gaara says gently bowing to her.

"Well now." She gazes up at him. "It will never cease to amazing me that after all these years a shinobi from the Sand and one from the Leaf can be friends." She reaches out and takes his hand between her small, frail ones. "But it is a good thing, for both our villages. I am glad to meet you Gaara."

"I was wondering if you had any mushrooms in today," Lee says and she lets go of Gaara's hands and goes to show Lee what produce she has.

They end up buying mushrooms and green onions and a carton of ripe cherries Grandmother Hamasaki forces Lee to take, despite his many protests, as a gift for all the work he did for her.

"He's a good young man," he tells Gaara as she rings up their purchases.

Her gaze is sharp on him for a moment. Beside him, Lee blushes and stammers about how helping out his neighbor is no trouble at all.

They stop by the fish market as well and Gaara watches Lee carefully selecting the fish for dinner. There are so many varieties here many he's never seen before. Konoha isn't that close to the ocean but they have plenty of freshwater fish and shellfish to choose from. There are of course no fish markets in Suna but Gaara had been to one once while in the Land of Water.

"What is this?" He pointed to a huge, muscular looking fish with a strangely flat face and long whiskery things coming out of his face.

"Oh, that's a catfish. Would you like us to buy it? Only I am not very good at cooking those yet."

"No," Gaara steps back from where he'd been examining the fish. "I've just never seen one before."

The two fish Lee picks outlook normal enough as far as Gaara's limited experience of fish goes.

Lee insists on carrying both of the bags on the way back to his apartment.

Their hands brush as they walk. Lee is carrying both of the grocery bags in one hand, leaving the hand closest to Gaara free. Gaara wonders what it would be like to reach out and take Lee's hand in his. He doesn't though.

Lee's apartment is on the first floor of a building that houses mostly shinobi. Lee unlocked the door, leads the way inside, and makes sure Gaara is settled before he starts to cook.

Gaara has been in Lee's apartment before, although not this particular one, which is new. Lee had lived on the top story of his previous apartment building he suspects the move to this apartment happened due to Gai's loss of mobility and long recovery after the war.

It is like Lee's old apartment incredibly tidy and clean, with very little furniture and yet Lee still manages to make the space feel welcoming.

There's a bookcase in the living room filled with volumes, unsurprisingly, on taijutsu but also a number of framed photographs.

Gaara walks over to example them as Lee brings the groceries into the kitchen.

There's a photograph if Lee's team when they'd been very young. All three of them squashed together by Gai who stands behind them pulling them to him in a giant hug as he grins ear to ear at the camera. There's a photograph of the three of them much older now in dressed up in traditional kimonos each holding a sparkler and smiling at the camera. There's one of just Neji as an adult, arms folded over his chest but mouth turned up in a small smile.

There's a photograph of Lee and Naruto as children again, Naruto pulling silly faces at the camera. Another of a much older Naruto and Sakura arms around each other's shoulders, laughing. A recent picture of Gai in his wheelchair, a little bit flushed and rumpled as if he'd just finished training, Kakashi casually leaning on the back of the chair, head bent forward as if in the act of saying something to Gai who's turned towards him. Then there's one of Gaara.

It's one of the ones he'd sent Lee, standing in his planting room holding a potted cactus between his hands.

He picks up the photograph and looks at it for a long few moments before putting it back and going to find Lee in the kitchen.

Lee is bustling around, dressed in a very green, very frilly apron with turtles on it, chopping vegetables, putting rice on, cleaning the fish. It's a little bit chaotic to watch, as Lee bounces from one task to the other but Lee seems relaxed and comfortable obviously practiced at this and in control of the situation. Gaara offers to help but Lee waves him away.

Gaara can cook too although mostly just very simple dishes. The truth is left up to his own devices Gaara would probably eat rice, tea and shinobi field rations for the rest of his life so mostly Kankuro or a member of his staff cook for him.

So Gaara sits and watches Lee's hands as he moves from task to task. The kitchen slowly fills with the scent of cooking food.

Lee doesn't stay quiet as we work, chatting happily about goings on in the village, filling Gaara in on the details of their friends' lives. Ino, Choji, and Sai were getting their own genin teams after this year's Academy graduation and Tenten had been assigned to the Hokage's personal guard.

"I am so proud of her. It is such an honor to serve the Hokage in that way." Lee stops what he was doing to clutch the rice spoon to his chest as his eyes fill up with happy tears.

"Yes and I'm sure she does it well."

He thinks about his own personal guard all ex ANBU handpicked by Kankuro.

"Gai-sensei is thinking about opening a dojo." Lee goes on, blinking away tears and returning to his cooking. "I think this is a brilliant plan since there is no doubt Gai-sensei is the most talented and youthful of teachers. Many young shinobi and civilians will have their lives completely changed by working with him."

"You wrote in your last letter that you were thinking about seeking help for your curry making," Gaara says, rather abruptly. He's still not the smoothest when it comes to transitioning conversations from one topic to another.

"I have sadly been struggling to master curry making," Lee says taking the switch in topics in stride, like always. "I was thinking of visiting my friend Karashi who owns a curry restaurant. He has a true, natural gift for curry making and I thought I would ask him to teach me the secret to creating a truly amazing curry or even an edible one."

"But you haven't yet."

"Well no," Lee tells him. "I have been busy with missions recently and Karashi's restaurant is located in the Land of Rivers."

That makes Gaara relax fractionally although he hadn't realized he'd tensed up, to begin with. The Land of Rivers isn't that close to Konoha although it is significantly closer than Suna is.

"Actually." Lee looks thoughtful. "You and Kankuro-san probably pass right by it on your way back and forth to Suna. Perhaps, if I am free and you would not mind, I could accompany you on your way back as far as the Land of Rivers and introduce you to Karashi."

Gaara weighs his options. He would very much like to have more time with Lee and he would also like to meet Karashi, see who this man is with his own eyes.

"I would love to have you try Karashi's signature curry." Lee continues earnestly. "He invented the recipe specifically for me and eating it has saved my life, not once but twice."

Gaara freezes as his brain process through the words invented the recipe specifically for me and save my life twice. "He invented a curry recipe for you?" He says aware his voice has gone flatter than usual but unable to stop it.

"Yes, and it is the most delicious dish in the world, perhaps in all of existence. Eating it is a true life-changing culinary experience."

Gaara stares at him as Lee beams, radiating happiness from his entire body.

Gaara swallows. "I would ... like to try this curry." And here he'd thought he'd let go of the urge to seek out pain.

"Excellent. I will ask for the Hokage's permission to accompany you as far as the Land of Rivers then." Lee gives him a thumbs up, then goes back to bustling around the kitchen, serving their meal.

The food is delicious. Gaara hadn't expected any less since Lee never settled for anything but greatness when it comes to mastering a skill.

When they are done eating Gaara stands with great reluctance. "Thank you, Lee, for the wonderful meal but I need to go, I have a meeting with the Hokage in a few minutes."

"Of course. Thank you for joining me."

Lee walks him out into the street and waves goodbye as Gaara heads towards the Fire building at the center of Konoha.

~*~

When Gaara finally gets back to the guesthouse after several hours of meetings he finds Kankuro stretched out on the couch.

Kankuro's eyes are closed but he's clearly not asleep yet.

"How was your evening?" Gaara asks

"Oh, it was great." Kankuro cracks his eyes open and smiling up at Gaara. "May have let Kiba talk me into one drink too many, but it was totally worth it. We had really exhalant barbecue and then we went over to Kiba's cousin's house to play with Kiba's cousin's dogs. So many dogs. Then we had more drinks. It was a good time." Kankuro does have that slightly silly grin he usually gets when he's been drinking. He stretches his arms over his head as Gaara undoes the straps to the gourd and set it on the floor.

"Maybe I should get a dog."

"Don't most dogs chew in wooden things and have a little too much fir for the desert?"

"Kiba says there are short haired dogs that like the heat," Kankuro says. "And I'm sure I could train it not to eat the puppets." His gaze drifts to Gaara again. "How was your date?"

Gaara gives him a quelling stare that has no effect at all on his older brother asides from making Kankuro's grin widen.

"If you are talking about dinner with Lee then it was not a date."

"So the whole 'please Lee let me go shopping with you so we can go back to your place and be domestic together' wasn't a line? Because it sounded like a line to me."

Gaara gives him an even flatter stare.

Kankuro holds up his hands. "Hey, I was proud of you. My baby brother all grown up and trying to seduce shinobi from other villages --"

"Stop." Gaara folds his arms over his chest. "I mean it Kankuro. You know I don't mind if you tease me but Lee is a very dear friend and I don't want him to be embarrassed."

Kankuro sighs and sits up. "Of course I wouldn't embarrass Lee or say anything about this to him if you don't want me to. But, Gaara, you know you should just talk to him. Maybe ask him out on a real date."

At that Gaara looks away, smoothing one hand down the front of his shinobi uniform. "I'm not sure he'd want that. Kankuro."

"Would you want that?" Kankuro sounds a lot soberer all of a sudden, and genuinely curious. "I mean I know that I tease and I know what it looks like but you've never actually talked about wanting to date anyone and you've been pretty resistant to the Council's attempts to arrange a marriage."

"I do not want to marry," Gaara says quickly because that at least is easy. He's considered each one of the ladies and princesses the Council has suggested for him. He'd determined that not only was he not interested in considering marriage now, he was also not interested in considering it anytime in the near future.

"But what about dating?" Kankuro says. "Have you thought about maybe doing that?"

"No," Gaara says. "I'm not sure I want that. I'm not sure Lee wants that."

Kankuro chews on his lower lip thoughtfully. "Temari is probably the better person to give you advice on this, being the only one of us in a relationship after all but I'd say you should figure out what you want to do with Lee soon and address it with him up front. So both of you can decide if you're just friends or something else."

Or something else.

Gaara's feels his jaw tighten. He wants to ask Kankuro what he should do but it doesn't seem fair, not when Kankuro's been drinking and truthfully doesn't have that much more experience with romance than Gaara does. He'll wait until tomorrow, or possible just speak with Temari instead.

He means to just leave the topic, for this evening at least, but instead, he finds himself asking. "Do you like Lee?"

Kankuro shifts so Gaara can sit next to him on the couch and thinks about the question. "Yeah, I like him. He can be intense but there's no question he's a great shinobi. I mean what he's managed to do would be amazing for anyone but the fact that he's managed to do it without any ninjutsu skills at all." Kankuro shakes his head. "And he's a good guy, so yeah I like him." He studies Gaara sidelong for a moment. "I like him with you in particular. Whether you decide to be friends or take the relationship in a different direction I think you two are good together. And I like that he's never treated you like you were different, even back in the beginning during the Chunin exams. He respected you as a competitor and a powerful shinobi but he didn't ..."

"Treat me like a monster?" Gaara's lips twist a little over the words.

Kankuro looks away. "Yeah."

"He would have had every reason to."

Kankuro puts his arm around Gaara's shoulders. "I'm your older brother, it's my job to always take your side."

It should make Gaara feel loved instead it makes him feel tired. He leans his head against Kankuro's shoulder and sighs.

It's been a long day, a long few days since they had not exactly taken the trip from Suna to Konoha slowly.

Both him and Kankuro should go to bed.

"I like him too," Gaara says. "Lee, I mean. I like Lee."

"I know." Kankuro chuckles softly and squeezes his shoulders. "I know you do and I think that's a good thing, whatever the two of you choose to do."

"Thank you." It is good to have Kankuro's support, to know his family would be there no matter what path Gaara chose to take in life, especially now.

Gaara thinks about Lee and realizes he has other things, where his feelings for Lee are concerned, that he would like to talk to Kankuro and perhaps Temari about.

Not tonight though, they both should sleep first.

~*~

"I want what's best for both of us," Gaara says when he meets Temari at a tea house the next day.

He has a short break between his morning and afternoon meetings and Kankuro had begged off his duties as Gaara's escort based on the fact that he's hungover from the night before.

Gaara has already given Temari a version of his conversation with Kankuro, their tea cooling on the table in front of them, along with an almost untouched plate of dango.

"But you don't know what you want," Temari says.

"I don't know what he wants either." Gaara looks down at the tea in his cup. "I don't want to raise the possibility of ... something else, between us only to find I am not capable of giving him what he wants."

"Emotionally?" Temari asks. "Physically? What do you think he wants Gaara?"

Truthfully Gaara hasn't really thought about the physical side to this, it's unimportant in the grand scheme of things, but it is potentially one more thing to worry about. He reaches out picks up a skewer with three fat dango balls on it, looks at it for a moment and then puts it back on the plate.

"I am Kazekage." He says without looking at Temari. "Lee is a shinobi of the Leaf, newly made jounin. He will never leave his village, nor would I ask him to. To want something with me despite the physical distance would be a lot to ask of anyone, but then as you pointed out there are other elements to consider. And I don't know what I want where those things are concerned or what I am willing to give."

Temari considers him for a long moment and then sighs. "Look Gaara, relationships are always a risk. They're messy you put yourself out there and just hope the two of you can make it work."

"What if I bring it up with him and then discover I don't want this at all?" Gaara means to fold his hands in his lap to keep them from fiddling with his cup and the dango but he finds he's clenching them together instead. "Lee is my friend. That's a bond I understand and one that makes us both happy, surely I should just leave it at that."

"Maybe you should, maybe it would be best to just leave this alone, but ask yourself if you'd be happier if you asked him to go on a date with you and he said yes." Temari takes a sip of her tea. "You don't have to marry him Gaara. It can be just as simple as a date."

"Like you and Shikamaru?"

"Yeah. Obviously, it's more now but we started by just going on a date." She smiles a little. "It was fun, but if it hadn't worked I would have gone back to Suna and it would have been awkward next time we saw each other but we would both have survived."

"You would have remained friends?"

"Yes. Like I said it would have been awkward but Shikamaru and I have been through too much for one bad date ruin our friendship."

Temari seems sure about that and it is a little bit relieving to hear. After all, Gaara and Lee have known each other a long time, and have also been through a lot together. If Temari can be confident that her relationship with Shikamaru could survive them trying a date and discovering it didn't work, surely the same could be said for Gaara and Lee.

Besides Lee is a very forgiving sort of person. If Gaara asks for a date and then discovers it is not what he wants Lee will probably understand it was an honest mistake. A case of Gaara reaching for something that was never meant to be his.

"Thank you Temari, this is helpful."

"If you want a romantic relationship then I hope you find someone you can be with, whether that ends up being Lee or not." She picks up one of the skewers of dango and eats it.

Gaara's grateful that she does since he isn't particularly hungry but the owner of the shop had graciously given them the dango for free and it would be rude to leave it.

"You being in a relationship could be good for everyone," Temari says once she's swallowed the dango. "The Council has pushed hard enough for it."

"Yes." Gaara's fingers clench together even tighter. Good for the stability of Suna was what the Council had told him when they'd first brought up the idea of his marriage. Gaara knew that they were in part referring to the economic and political benefits of him allying himself through marriage to some other nation. But also if he were to marry and have a family it would serve in many people's minds as the ultimate proof that he was no longer the monster they had feared.

Protecting them up to the point of sacrificing his own life had not been enough evidently, or fighting a particularly costly war, or serving faithfully as Kazekage for years.

Still, the argument that security and stability would come from his marriage had been almost enough to sway him. But he could not let his life be dictated by the provably wrong-headed idea that one act or even a series of acts could convince every resident of Suna to trust and respect him. Already he had gained far more trust than he'd ever dared imagine, in time he might gain more. He couldn't base a relationship solely on that hope though. It wouldn't be fair to him or the other person involved.

Especially since at this moment, that other person could be Lee.

"Whether or not my relationship would be good for Suna has to be a secondary consideration. After I decide if it would be good for me and ..." He hesitates for a moment. "Lee."

"I know, but I'm saying if you choose to go through with it, with Lee or someone else, there could be more benefits than just seeing my brother happy. The fact that marriage between me and Shikamaru will go along way in cementing our alliance with Konoha for at least another generation is worth considering and something I've taken into account but it's not the reason I'm marrying him. " She smiles fondly in that way she does when she thinks about Shikamaru.

Gaara wonders what he looks like when he thinks about Lee.

Judging by his expression in the photographs he sends Lee, probably slightly confused.

~*~

By hour five Gaara is wishing he'd said no to this curry expedition idea.

Not that it isn't lovely to have Lee along. Lee is always lovely as far as Gaara is concerned.

Lee had been cheerful and energetic the entire way, despite the fact that it had been raining when they started out.

"The only problem with traveling through the woods in the rain is that you must be extra vigilant since tree frogs are particularly prone to coming out in the rain and you would not want to squash one by accident," Lee says.

"Are they dangerous?" Gaara is pretty sure that if there were dangers of that sort in the forests around Konoha someone would have mentioned it to him by now.

Lee blinks at him. "Oh no, just adorable, which is why you would not want to squash them. Not that I think you would purposefully hurt any frog." He adds just in case Gaara is getting the idea Lee thinks he's a frog murderer.

Gaara who hasn't even killed a scorpion recently just smiles at him.

"I'll try to be careful." Gaara glances around them at the forest path and the trees."What do these tree frogs look like?"

"Oh, uh ... they're small and green." Lee looks a little helplessly around them too. "Do you not have frogs in Suna?"

"No. We have desert toads that store water in their abdomens. But not frogs."

"Well." Lee falls into step beside him and proceeds to tell Gaara many interesting facts about frogs.

"Are desert toads anything like the mountain toads Naruto can summon?" Lee asks when he seems to have run out of fun frog facts to tell Gaara.

"No, they're small and have no ninja abilities that I know of." Gaara thinks about it. "Although I wouldn't discount the idea. There are stories of giant toads living in caves deep in the desert so perhaps. But if shinobi have ever had summoning contracts with such creates it has not been for a very long time. If you are dying of thirst though you can find one, squeeze it and drink the water. As a last measure means of survival."

"Really last measure," Kankuro says. "I'd almost rather die of dehydration personally."

"Does it hurt the toad?" Lee asks.

"Not if you're gentle when you squeeze it. Although you are certainly stealing its water supply."

When they break Lee trots away into the trees and comes back a moment later hands cupped together. He holds them out to Gaara and then uncups them slowly so Gaara can see the tiny green frog sitting the palm of Lee's hand.

It is very small and a bright green with a sort of dappled brown pattern that would make it hard to spot if you were running fast through the branches of the trees. He can see why Lee felt the need to warn him.

Gaara reaches out and touches it's cool, soft skin with the tip of one finger. The frog leaps away out of Lee's hands back into the undergrowth around them.

Lee beams at him. Even with the rain, Gaara feels himself warm a little bit in the light of Lee's smile.

He's glad he asked Lee to come along.

The closer they get to the Land or Rivers however the more Lee begins to talk about Karashi and the Curry of Life restaurant.

He tells them about the first time Karashi and his mother saved Lee's life.

"Gai-sensei and I both fell into a training-induced coma and I would have never woken if not for the Curry of Life," Lee says as Gaara and Kankuro exchange skeptical glances. If anyone else had told this story, Gaara would have assumed they were lying for some reason, but Lee doesn't lie.

The second time Karashi's cooking had saved Lee had been when Lee and his team, plus Naruto had been battling Kurosuki Family lead by Raiga Kurosuki one of the Seven Shinobi Swordsmen of the Mist. Evidently, Karashi and his mother had rushed onto the battlefield to revive Lee and his team with life-giving curry allowing them to finish the fight and free the townsfolk.

Again it seems borderline impossible that this had actually happened but there is also no good reason for Lee to make it up, not that Gaara can tell.

"The Curry of Life is truly the most amazing, magical dish to ever exist. I am so humbled to have inspired such culinary greatness." Lee wiped a tear from his eye or possible also rainwater.

Gaara and Kankuro exchanged another look.

"It will be perfect on a day like today.It will invigorate us after a day of traveling in this cold rainy weather and fortify you for the rest of the journey to Suna." Lee goes on. "And I will be able to ask Karashi many questions about curry making, so I will have perfected my own special curry by the next time you come to visit Konoha." Lee has his fists clenched in determination. It's cute but Gaara doesn't like the way his insides twist up every time Lee mentions Karashi.

It's jealousy, that's obvious at this point, but knowing what it is doesn't make him like it anymore.

The Curry of Life Shop is an unremarkable building by the side of the road but a good distance from the nearest town.

It could have been an inn or a teahouse if not for the sign outside declaring it a curry restaurant.

"Lee!" A boy in his early teens ran up to them and hugged Lee around the middle.

"Ranmaru, how are you?" Lee hugged him back.

"Very well. I'm going to the school in the village and working here, and there is a training program in Takumi Village for business owners Karashi says he might send me to next year but only if I want to go."

"That sounds wonderful Ranmaru. I am glad to hear that you are healthy and well and that your hard work is paying off." Lee ruffles his hair. "Where is your older brother?"

At that, a man ducked out from the kitchen and into the eating area of the shop.

He was not particularly tall but well built, although Gaara thinks it's from hard physical work rather than natural body type. His long, dark hair is pulled back from his face and jaw outlined by a small beard.

"Lee." His face lights as Ranmaru's had when he sees them and he comes forward to clasp Lee's hand between his. "Come in, sit down. You're just in time, there's a fresh batch of curry that's almost done." His gaze goes from Lee to Gaara and Kankuro faltering a little bit at the site of them.

"Are these fellow shinobi from Konoha?" He asks Lee.

"No my friends Gaara and Kankuro are shinobi from Suna in the Land of Wind." Lee's own gaze goes to Gaara, asking a question.

Gaara shakes his head minutely then steps forward. "Lee has told us so much about your curry we thought we'd stop by and try it for ourselves."

That makes Karashi blush and stammer a thank you before whipping back into the kitchen again.

Ranmaru shows them all to a table and pours them glasses of water, before putting two full pitchers on the table.

"Has Lee told you much about the Curry of Life?" He asks.

"He's told us lots of stories about how it changed his life," Kankuro says.

"It helped me regain my strength as well. When Lee first met me I could barely walk or move my arms." Ranmaru says, "but it can also be an intense experience. Let me know if you need more water."

Kankuro looks increasingly dubious. From where he's seated across the table next to Gaara Lee gives Kankuro a reassuring smile and a thumbs up.

Karashi comes back out of the kitchen carrying three plates with healthy helpings of rice and curry on each.

The curry on the plates is jet black, Gaara has never seen anything so black. Even before Karashi puts the plates on the table the scent starts doing things to his sinuses he's never experienced before.

Out of the corner of his eyes, he sees Kankuro do the trick they'd been taught for surviving poison gas attacks. Lee, on the other hand, all but leans over his plate inhaling deeply.

"This is the original Curry of Life recipe as it was created for Lee by myself and my dearly departed mother," Karashi says. "I hope you enjoy it."

Gaara smiles at Karashi. "Thank you for the food and your hospitality.

There's no way they can get away with not eating it now.

"Thank you so much Karashi, this looks as delicious as ever. I cannot wait to taste it again." Lee grabs his spoon and starts wolfing down huge mouthfuls as if his life depends on it. Which if the stories are true it had a couple of times.

Kankuro visibly steals himself but Gaara knows Kankuro really only has two fears in life and this curry is unlikely to either kill Gaara or contain scorpions.

At least Gaara hopes it doesn't contain scorpions.

Kankuro takes a small bite and then chews thoughtfully. "Actually it's not that bad."

He takes a much larger bite even though there is sweat breaking out across his face and down his neck.

Lee's face at this point has gone such a truly alarming shade of red that Gaara wonders if he should make Lee stop eating and lie down.

He picks up his own spoon and takes a small bite.

There's a sensation that hits him first, that he can't quite identify and then the heat, and then the melding and combination of flavors.

It's intense, there is really no other way to describe it, but also strangely compelling.

He takes another bite.

It's like being hit in the head very hard. Like the exhilarating thrill of a fight. Like the few times, he'd jumped from a large height, knowing the sand would in all likelihood be there to catch him but not being completely sure.

Plus also there are a lot of hot peppers involves. In near fire style jutsu quantities.

He east and thinks he can understand why this wouldn't be to everyone's tastes but also why Lee would crave it.

All three of them finish off their plates in record time. Gaara sips water and Kankuro looks slightly dazed.

"That was amazing Karashi! Even better than I remember!" Lee calls before picking up his empty plate and trotting into the kitchen.

Ranmaru comes back over to their table. "Would you like seconds?"

"No," Kankuro says succinctly and Gaara shakes his head.

"Do you and your brother live here?"

Ranmaru looks surprised by the question. "Yes, there's a house behind the restaurant. Although Karashi's been thinking about moving recently. Business is good enough but it could be better if we were closer to a village. We've stayed here mostly because of Karashi's mother, grandmother Sanshō, but she passed away last year."

"I'm sorry to hear that," Gaara says as Kankuro starts downing cups of water.

"She was a kind woman and a great chef." Ranmaru smiles sadly as he takes their plates back to the kitchen.

Gaara gets up and goes outside to stretch his legs. He walks around the front of the shop and then a little ways into the forest. They are quite isolated out here, he can see how that would not be good for business.

"Gaara." Lee bounces out to meet him as Gaara heads back to the shop. "Come here please, I want you to taste this."

Gaara is not sure how much more food he's capable of tasting for Lee today, but he follows Lee back into the shop and then the kitchen where Karashi is bent over several large stock pots of bubbling curry.

There's a bowl of spices on a workbench that Lee picks up and tastes a pinch off before offering to Gaara. "Karashi is teaching me that the trick to a good curry is mastering the right blend of spices and letting it cook long enough."

Gaara tastes obediently. It's milder than he was expecting and the spices are quite good.

"It's good."

Lee beams at him. "I came up with this blend, with Karashi's guidance of course. I will take this recipe back with me to Konoha and work on perfecting it there." He turns his smile on Karashi who blushes again and smiles back.

"Thank you Karashi, you have true talent," Lee says bowing to Karashi who blushes even bright, clutching his cooking spoon.

"I don't have nearly the talent my mother did but I am doing my very best to follow in her footsteps and be the curry chef she would want me to be."

"What a great and noble goal." Lee steps closer to Karashi clasping his shoulders, the tears in his eyes mirroring Karashi's own.

Gaara looks between the two of them, feeling the urge not to be there. Maybe he can tactfully step out while they're busy crying in each other's arms.

"Anyway." Karashi pulls himself together. "You can come back anytime you like Lee and I would be more than happy to help you with your curry making."

"Thank you, my friend."

"Lee." Gaara touches his shoulder. "Kankuro and I need to leave soon."

"Of course." Lee turns away from Karashi looking slightly guilty. "It is a long trip to Suna after all."

Gaara nods and then turns to Karashi. "It was a pleasure meeting you, thank you so much for the food and the warm welcome."

"Anytime. Friends of Lee's are always welcome here." Karashi tells him sincerely.

Gaara nods again and goes to collect Kankuro who's finished off both pitchers of water.

Lee follows them out.

"Thank you so much for coming with me and tasting the curry," Lee says as earnest as ever as he gazes at Gaara. "It was wonderful seeing both of you in person again and I hope you come back to visit Konoha soon."

"With Temari getting married we probably will." Kankuro shifts his pack and puppet summoning scrolls more securely on his back gaze already scanning the road they will be taking back to Suna.

"Please continue to write," Lee says. "And send pictures. I enjoy getting them so much."

"Of course. I enjoy getting your letters as well."

Lee smiles so bright and happy makes a move as if to hug Gaara and thinks better of it stepping back offering his hand instead.

Gaara takes his hand, lets himself savor the feeling of Lee's strong fingers wrapped around his own.

They're holding the handshake for too long and they both know it but Gaara doesn't want to step away.

"Come back soon so I can cook you another hearty and youthful meal." Lee lets go of Gaara's hand finally in order to illustrate the youthful qualities of said meal with both hands.

Gaara smiles. "I look forward to it and I hope I can."

He, with great reluctance, turns back to Kankuro and follows him down the road, looking back several times to where Lee is standing, waving to them until he's out of sight.

"You should just ask him out," Kankuro says. "For real. I'm surprised he hasn't asked you out himself."

Gaara thinks about it as he walks. His jealousy over Karashi is less about feeling Karashi is some sort of romantic threat. Lee is an adult and can choose to become romantically involved with whoever he wants after all and Gaara respects that.

Also, Lee does not have a framed photograph of Karashi in his living room.

Gaara thinks about the restaurant, about the little house he'd glimpsed out back, about Lee and Karashi cooking together in the kitchen and how fond Ranmaru obviously is of Lee.

It is easy to imagine Karashi moving his shop to Konoha where the business would no doubt be good. Of Lee building a little training field out behind Karashi's house, training and living there, helping Karashi run the shop and raise Ranmaru. It would be a good life, quiet and normal. Everything Gaara couldn't offer a partner.

Because at the end of the Gaara wasn't just a shinobi he was Kazekage, his life would never be quiet or normal, there would always be danger and uncertainty.

If normality and domesticity were what Lee wanted then Gaara would never be able to give it to him, no matter how much he might care or even love Lee.

You're not really jealous, you're afraid that you won't be able to make him happy or give him what he wants.

And he'd been a little jealous too, that's what had started this after all.

Gaara sighs. He follows Kankuro down the road half his mind on the lookout for any signs of danger and the other half mulling over the problem.

Maybe he's making this more complicated than it needs to be. After all, he's never talked to Lee about what Lee wants. Maybe Lee did want the sort of normal life a civilian could more easily offer him, but maybe he didn't. Lee was a shinobi; he'd fought and worked hard to be one. He had not ever to Gaara's knowledge chosen a normal life.

Relationships are always a risk, Temari had said.

Maybe it was time for Gaara to risk a little and trust that no matter what happened Lee would still always be his friend.

~*~

He writes Lee a letter when he gets back to Suna.

Not immediately, of course, that's a lot of work he needs to do first, but several days after he arrives back in Suna he sits down to write to Lee:

_I have thought a lot about how to write this letter to you. What words to use, but even now I'm not sure I know. I come to have feelings for you different from that of friendship. If we were in the same village I would ask you out on a date. I will still ask you out on a date next time I see you if you want. So I suppose the best I can do at this distance is ask if you would want that? Would you like to go on a date with me?_

_I think about you all the time and I like you a great deal Lee._

_Yours,_

_Gaara_

Lastly, he takes a photograph of himself. This time without a cactus, standing in his office beside his desk, straight ahead at the camera. He's too nervous to even try to smile, but he takes it anyway and tucks it into the letter.

He seals and sends both before he can think better of it and scrap the entire thing.

The next few day are agonizingly long.

He can send a letter or scroll to Konoha in a matter of hours but that is only for priority correspondence to the Hokage. And as much as Gaara likes and respects Kakashi he's not the one Gaara wants to ask out on a date.

He sends the letter to Lee by normal mail delivery and waits.

Waiting it turns out involves a lot of moody pacing and repotting of every cactus that even vaguely looks like it needs it, and reducing at least one training field's worth of posts to rubble.

Gaara weeds out his closest, he's not even sure why he still owns mesh shirts since he hasn't worn them since he was fourteen. He orders some civilian clothes since he's been meaning to do that, cleans the Kazekage residence and does every piece of paperwork the moment it's put in front of him.

It's a stressful few days that drags on into a week.

Everyone around him is starting to get twitchy. Not that he'd been the least bit aggressive towards any of them, but he's certainly been restless and only becomes more so.

His staff have come to expect him to be calm and collected no matter the situation. It's unnerving them now that Gaara can't seem to sit still for a more than a few minutes unless he has a specific task to accomplish.

"What are you doing?" Kankuro asks as he walks into Gaara's office.

"The budget," Gaara says without looking up, even so, he knows Kankuro is frowning at him.

"We finalized the budget three months ago."

  
"That was this year’s, I'm starting on the first draft for next year."

Kankuro sighs, "He hasn't written back to you then."

"No. But it does take a few days for mail to get back and forth from here to Konoha and he'd probably want a little time to think about it." That's at least is what he's been telling himself for the last few day.

Lee will write him back, no matter what his answer because this is Lee who always meets everything head on.

"Well, I hope it comes soon," Kankuro mutters. "And stop writing next year's budget!" He says louder this time. "I'm sure we can find you some work for this year if we try hard enough."

Gaara does stop writing next year's budget and starts lurking in the mailroom instead, especially around the time he knows the mail comes in.

So he's right there when the letter does.

"Kazekage." One of the shinobi who sorts and inspects the mail turns to him holding out a slightly battered envelope postmarked from Konoha.

Gaara snatches it from her. It has Lee's name on it and his heart rate picks up. "Thank you." He says and gives her a small bow before turning on his heel and heading back to his office as fast as he can without actually running.

He seats himself at his desk and reaches for the letter opener. The sheet of paper inside is like the envelope slightly creased.

_Dear Gaara,_

_Words cannot express the overflowing of emotions I experienced when I read your letter. I, of course, wanted to set out for Suna that every evening but I have my duties here in Konoha as you have yours. So I am writing you instead to say yes!!! Yes, of course, I will go on a date with you! Of course, I want that I cannot imagine that anything that would make me happier._

_Yours faithfully,_

_Lee._

For what felt like the first time in weeks Gaara let out his breath in a long sigh. The knot that had been growing steadily in his chest loosens.

There is something else in the envelope. Gaara reaches in and pulls it out thinking for a moment that it's another sheet of paper. He finds when he turns it over though that it's a photograph of Lee grinning at the camera radiating joy.

Gaara feels his own mouth turn up in a smile.

It's all right. Lee had said yes.

He sits and looks at the photograph for several long moments and then he gets up and goes looking for a picture frame.

~*~

For the next few months, things are normal. Gaara occupies himself with plans for new waterways for fresh water and an actual state of the art sewer system for the entirety of Suna.

A letter from Lee comes almost every week like normal.

This being Lee Gaara had expected floral decorations but Lee writes like he's always written about his training, happenings in the lives of their friends, updates on his cooking attempts. It's very Lee, it's very normal, it soothes some of Gaara's remaining anxiety.

But it's not as if Gaara's letter had never happened but every once in a while Lee will write him this:

_The cherry trees are in bloom here. There is a street where I like to run in the evenings the trees are tall enough that their branches hang over the walls and partly shade the road (I find the shade makes it cooler for vigorous summer runs.) Now every time I run there I think about you and how fascinated you are by plant and growing things. Also here viewing the cherry blossoms is something to do with someone special. I think about holding your hand and showing them to you on a particularly beautiful evening._

It makes Gaara warm inside to read things like this from Lee. He supposes that Lee is no longer thirteen and does not need to make loud, romantic declarations when he can write Gaara this and it mean just as much, if not more, to the both of them.

Gaara writes too although not as frequently, as he had before he writes about small mundane things, about his cactuses about an interesting thing he found in the Suna marketplace, about a recipe he wants to try.

Once he writes:

_I woke up thinking about you and thoughts of you kept distracting me from my paperwork. I want so much to see you, to go on our date together._

And after a moment of thinking, he adds.

_I would love to see the cherry blossoms with you, I hope I arrive in Konoha before the season has passed._

In all reality, he will probably miss seeing them with Lee but it feels right to tell Lee that Gaara too has been thinking about doing this together.

He takes pictures of himself too like he has been doing.

Briefly, he'd considered changing the sorts of pictures he sends. He can't think how to do that though beyond being more sexually provocative. He's not interested in doing that though even if Lee would have wanted it, which he's not at all sure he does. So he dismisses the idea right away.

In the end, he just goes back to taking pictures of just him, standing with his cactuses or seated in his office, as he had before.

He does try to smile more though and maybe he manages to look less confused, less guarded, or at least he hopes so.

The plan to travel back to Konoha come naturally. He needs to finalize his plans with the Hokage about the genin exchange program. He also wants to company a small delegation of shinobi engineers who are interested in studying Konoha's own water delivery system. He proposes the visit to Kakashi and Kakashi clears it.

 _I will be visiting Konoha._ He writes Lee. _I would like to see you while I'm there if you are not away on a mission._

That last part worries him. Who knows how many more months it will before he can visit Konoha again but there is no guarantee that Lee will be there, he is an active duty shinobi after all. With how infrequently Gaara visits it could be months before their duties would allow them to see each other.

The thought of having to wait that long to see Lee keeps him up basing restlessly around the Kazekage residence when he should be resting.

Worst still he hasn't received a response to his letter by the time they leave, which makes him moodily silent during the first leg of their trip.

When they break to rest the first night Kankuro comes over to where Gaara is unpacking his bag and crouches beside him.

"It'll be all right you know." Kankuro's hand lands on Gaara's shoulder. "Even if he's not here this time we'll figure it out you know. We made it work for Temari, we'll make it work for you."

Gaara gives Kankuro a small smile. "Thank you."

He tries to be a little bit more cheerful for the next two days of travel, making a point to smile at some of the other shinobi and strike of conversations with the engineers.

Lying awake at night though with only the night patrol the keep him company he lets himself wonder what he will do if Lee isn't there when they get to Konoha.

His duty obviously but still. Kankuro had said they would make it work like they had for Temari but Temari is not the Kazekage.

It feels like an endless three-day trip.

Gaara steals himself as soon as they are within sight of Konoha's gates. They've not quite made it there though when the green blur comes out of nowhere and Gaara is lifted up off his feet into the air.

For a split second he can feel all the Suna shinobi around him brace themselves and go for their weapons but Gaara himself does not react.

He knows who it is and he knows he's not in danger. He just hugs Lee back and holds on as tightly as he can.

Lee is squeezing him a little bit too hard with the force of his embrace. His body is a big, hard wall of muscle Gaara is currently being crushed against but Gaara doesn't care. Lee can go on crushing him, he's fine with it. This close Lee smells a little like dried leaves, the mineral oil used for treating shinobi weapons and clean fresh air.

"I missed you," Lee says rather wetly against the side of Gaara's neck. Gaara trust they are happy tears soaking into the collar of his formal robes.

"I missed you too." Gaara presses his own face against Lee's wide shoulder, lets his eyes close for just a moment.

One of the shinobi behind Gaara clears their throat awkwardly.

Lee seems to become aware that he's embracing the Kazekage in front of a whole delegate of Suna shinobi plus the Konoha gate guards. He stiffens then places Gaara back on his feet gently.

"I am sorry Lord Kazekage." He says and when Gaara blinks up a this he's blushing hotly.

"It's okay Lee, we understand," Kankuro says and Gaara can tell from the tone of his voice that Kankuro is grinning.

He really wants to kick his brother, but they aren't standing close enough and besides, it would be undignified.

"Lee please call me Gaara," he says instead reaching out to put a hand on Lee's arm.

If anything that just makes Lee blushes even brighter and squeaks out something too strangled for Gaara to make out.

"I need to go meet with the Hokage and Council in order to present the delegates I've traveled with to them but afterward I would like to talk to you if that would be all right," Gaara says.

Lee swallows and finds his voice. "Of course Gaara."

"Good." Gaara takes his hand away from Lee's arm with great reluctance and starts forward again, leading his little party past the smirking gate guards and into Konoha.

~*~

It's later than Gaara would have liked when he finally finds Lee.

He'd presented his delegation to the Hokage and Konoha Council. Various council members had questions for his engineers, which they'd done their best to answer followed by a formal dinner reception he hadn't known about and then he'd had to go back to the guesthouse to drop his things off.

It's unquestionably night by the time he makes his way through the streets of Konoha towards Lee's apartment. He hopes Lee hadn't been expecting to cook dinner for the two of them this time, or if he had that he won't be too disappointed.

The night is warm, there's a little bit of a breeze and he can hear the rest of insects in the trees around the village. It's a beautiful night yet he finds his heart beating fast with sudden anxiety has he stops in front of Lee's door.

He hesitates for a long moment just staring at the plain white paint.

Then the door is flung open and Lee has his arms wrapped around Gaara again albeit in a gentler hug than at the gates.

"I am sorry," Lee says breathlessly as he pulls away. "I should have asked before hugging you, this time and last time but I am so happy to see you again Gaara."

"It's all right," Gaara says smiling and finds that he means it. It is all right, now that Lee is here with him.

The bubble of anxiety is still there, lodged in the center of his chest but it's smaller and more manageable with Lee is smiling at him and holding out his hand.

Because it is truly a beautiful night they end up on Lee's small square of yard behind his apartment. Lee takes some cushions from his living room for them to sit on even though Gaara doesn't mind just sitting on the ground. They sit close enough for their shoulders to brush, close enough to hold hands if they wanted to.

Gaara looks up at the sky, the moon is large and bright tonight and he's grateful that these days he can admire the beauty of it without being caught up in less pleasant memories.

"Did you mean it? Would you really like to go on a date with me?" Lee sounds hesitant now that his immediate excitement over seeing Gaara had worn off.

Gaara looks way from the sky and back at down at him.

"Yes. Very much." He reaches out across the small space between them and covers Lee's hand with his. Then he takes a breath, braces himself. "But Lee you have to realize before we start anything that I am Kazekage. Whatever was between us couldn't be like Shikamaru and Temari because I can never leave Suna and I will never ask you to leave Konoha, you have worked too hard to become a jounin of the leaf, I won't have you give that up. But," He takes another slow and steady breath. "That functionally means the time we will have together will always be short, fleeting even. Most our communication will have to be through letters or otherwise long distance and I don't know ... I don't know manageable that will be for either of us."

Lee shifts as Gaara speaks turning so he can face Gaara, kneeling beside him in the grass.

"Gaara." Lee says. "I understand what you are saying I do but we are shinobi. Even if I was to move to Suna or you were to come to here to Konoha it is very likely that the time we would have together would be fleeting and too short. That is a possibility that we live with everyday. It is sadly part of the path of being a ninja. But we should not let that limit us." He takes Gaara's hand gently between his scarred and callused ones."If you truly want to ..." He falters for a moment then gathers his courage. "Date me than we should take every moment together we can and not worry about the ones we won't have."

Gaara looks down at their joined hands.

He has so many other questions jumbled up inside his head; can they do this, will it work out, will it make them both happy.

Instead, he says "Can I kiss you?"

Lee nods eyes going wide as he leans forward just a little and then stops.

Gaara closes the distance between them, presses their lips together. Lee's lips are a little bit dry but mostly soft and very sweet. He kisses Gaara back softly, their lips exploring and touching, slow and gentle until they both pull back.

Lee is still holding Gaara's hand. "How long will you be here for?" He asks.

"A few days," Gaara says. "Maybe as long as a week. Depending on what my engineers say."

Lee brightens at that "Than I will have time to cook for you again. I will make you curry. Tenten and Sakura both say it is very good now that I've worked out my spice blend. And we can go on a walk together. You missed the cherry blossoms but there are other beautiful sights I can show you."

"As a date," Gaara says just to clarify.

Lee smiles at him. "If you want to."

Gaara nods. "I would love to."

He stands, holding his hand out to Lee, who takes it, rising smoothly to his feet.

Together they turn and go back inside.

 


End file.
